I did not know I had developed any compassion for others until today. It snuck up on me. I had the impression that I should make sure things were okay with my neighbor. I went to talk to her. This morning her boyfriend died in a car accident. They are a young couple probably in their mid-20's. I actually started crying because she would be struggling through this. It surprised me, but it was nice to discover that somewhere in all my abruptness I actually have some softness.
The questions I have are, when did it get there, and why didn't I know about it? What can I do for her? What does a person need from a stranger in times like this?
Naomi has already made her a super cute and thoughtful condolence card. I know that the succor a child offers is always purer than what an adult can offer, but I would really like to be there for our neighbor.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Church talk ... other churches call these Sermons
Father's Day comes. and I received invitation to speak at our Sacrament Services. This is not uncommon in a small branch, but I am nervous. It is about The Blessings that come to us when we keep our Covenants. This is a loaded topic. I also get to teach Relief Society that same day. Do you think anyone will be asleep from the monotoony of my voice by the end of church?
I enjoy public speaking, but I always have concern to teach gospel topics and keeping them on point and true. I would hate to teach any false or incorrect doctrine and mislead someone.
How has keeping your covenants brought the Lord's blessings in your life?
I enjoy public speaking, but I always have concern to teach gospel topics and keeping them on point and true. I would hate to teach any false or incorrect doctrine and mislead someone.
How has keeping your covenants brought the Lord's blessings in your life?
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Hear's the Thing
How much do we actually hear when someone talks to us? Listening is not merely about catching the sound waves. No. It is so much deeper than that. Connotations, personal for you and the speaker, society and culture, life experience and education. All these create the meaning a person may have when using a term, but do we as the listener take all that into consideration? Who has time to take in all that information and put it into the listening formula in enough time to respond to the speaker when he is finished with his sentence? Add to this the intonation, facial expressions, hand movements, eye contact, and body language. How many of us have taken the time to learn what the person we talk with most does or means when they do what they do during anger, sorrow, happiness, confiding, or lying? Is it any wonder that there is so much misunderstanding? It does not need to be this way.
There is something that will bridge the gaps, something that takes time to learn, but in the end--it bridges the gaps. Spirit of discernment. Truth is in the air. Truth is everpresent and cannot all be put to words. However, it can be communicated to the willing listener who really wants to hear what another is meaning. It is out there in the ethers, but it is between the two speakers that this spirit is trying to interpret from one to the other.
Do you know about discernment? Do you try to learn about it and practice it? Is it 100% accurate? Probably not 100% of the time, but if we trust that our interest is in really hearing to understand, then maybe it will be accurate more often than not.
Maybe that bridge will actually become permanent. The trust it helps create contributes to the ability to hear better in the future as well as in the willingness to speak openly without hidden agendas or code words. The more a person realizes that the person they are talking with really 'gets' what they are saying, the less defensive their way of communicating becomes until it is stripped down to simple truth. No political correctness, no fear, no manipulation or selfish agenda's just open, two-way communication that breaks down all our barriers and lies, protections and inhibitions, ending the need to always think first about how we want ourselves to look in the outcome. We only concern ourselves with the best out-come. The right out-come.
Stop taking everything someone says personally, and start hearing how they are taking things, then speak in a way to break away their pain and their fear and the need that person feels to protect themselves from judgmental ears.
Be willing to hear the truth about yourself no matter how much you might dislike it. When you can do this, then you actually have the right to speak truth to another. Until we can hear it and accept it about ourselves, who are we to impose it on someone else? When we take the first step to hear truth, the person speaking will then feel that and attempt to hear truth as well.
Someone needs to start. Will that be you, or will you wait for someone else to seek truth in speaking? Will you hear truth or do you prefer to live with the lies?
There is something that will bridge the gaps, something that takes time to learn, but in the end--it bridges the gaps. Spirit of discernment. Truth is in the air. Truth is everpresent and cannot all be put to words. However, it can be communicated to the willing listener who really wants to hear what another is meaning. It is out there in the ethers, but it is between the two speakers that this spirit is trying to interpret from one to the other.
Do you know about discernment? Do you try to learn about it and practice it? Is it 100% accurate? Probably not 100% of the time, but if we trust that our interest is in really hearing to understand, then maybe it will be accurate more often than not.
Maybe that bridge will actually become permanent. The trust it helps create contributes to the ability to hear better in the future as well as in the willingness to speak openly without hidden agendas or code words. The more a person realizes that the person they are talking with really 'gets' what they are saying, the less defensive their way of communicating becomes until it is stripped down to simple truth. No political correctness, no fear, no manipulation or selfish agenda's just open, two-way communication that breaks down all our barriers and lies, protections and inhibitions, ending the need to always think first about how we want ourselves to look in the outcome. We only concern ourselves with the best out-come. The right out-come.
Stop taking everything someone says personally, and start hearing how they are taking things, then speak in a way to break away their pain and their fear and the need that person feels to protect themselves from judgmental ears.
Be willing to hear the truth about yourself no matter how much you might dislike it. When you can do this, then you actually have the right to speak truth to another. Until we can hear it and accept it about ourselves, who are we to impose it on someone else? When we take the first step to hear truth, the person speaking will then feel that and attempt to hear truth as well.
Someone needs to start. Will that be you, or will you wait for someone else to seek truth in speaking? Will you hear truth or do you prefer to live with the lies?
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